Q: Did you hear about the flasher who couldn't stop?
a: he decided to stick it out for one more year.
Q: Did you hear about the new mike tyson computer?
a: it has two bytes and no memory.
Q: Did you hear about the three gay men who attacked a woman?
a: two held her down while the third did her hair.
Q: Have you heard about playboy's new magazine for married men?
a: same centerfold every month.
Q: Hear the slogan for the stealth condom?
a: they'll never see you coming.
Q: How do deaf people have phone sex?
a: by fax.
Q: How do you know you've walked into a gay church service?
a: only half the congregation are kneeling.
Q: What are the 2 most important holes of a women?
a: her nostrils, so that she can breath while giving a blowjob.
Q: What charges can you bring against a transvestite?
a: male fraud.
Q: What did the wife do when she found out her husband was gay?
a: she turned around and took it like a man.
Q: What do kodak and condoms have in common?
a: they both capture the moment.
Q: What do you call a bouncer in a gay bar?
a: a flame thrower.
Q: What do you call a bunch of tractors parked in front of a McDonalds on friday night in Iowa?
a: prom.
Q: What do you call a herd of masturbating bulls?
a: beef strokin' off
Q: What do you call a spanish guy who lost his car?
a: carlos.
Q: What do you call kinky sex with chocolate?
a: s&m&m.
Q: What does a Jewish pedohpile say?
a: hey kid, take it easy on that fucking candy!
Q: what would it take to reunite the Beatles?
a: two more bullets.
Q: What's the definition of a good salesman?
a: a really great salesman is one who can actually make his wife feel sorry for the girl who lost her panties and bra in his car.
Q: What's the difference between a Tampon and a cowboy hat?
a: cowboy hats are for assholes.
Q: Why are guys so good at video games?
a: it's the eye-hand coordination developed after all those years of jerking off to playboy centerfolds.
Q: Why can't MS. Piggy count to 70?
a: because when she reaches 69, she gets a frog in her throat.
Q: Why did Osama Bin Ladin kill one of his wives?
a: he peeped up her skirt and saw bush.
Q: Why did the former porn actor get fired from his job as a gas station attendant?
a: right before the tanks were full, he would pull out the nozzle and spray gas all over the car.
Q: Why did the polack keep an empty bottle of milk in his refrigerator?
a: in case someone wanted a black coffee.
Q: Why does the easter bunny hide eggs?
a: so people won't know he's been fucking chickens!
Q: Why don't Mr. and Mrs. Smokey Bear have any children?
a: because every time she gets hot, he hits her over the head with a shovel and throws dirt on her.
Q: Why don't roosters have hands?
a: because chickens don't have tits.
Q: What's the difference between snowmen and snowwomen?
a: snowballs